Spoof YSTV listings explained

Many of the descriptions contain a lot of in-jokes from the station team of the period, which I've tried to annotate and explain here.

0600 YSTV Breakfast

Start your day with news, sport, travel and weather. With James Murnaghan and Kat Kaplinsky.

0925 Kate

The daily discussion show featuring chavs, fatties, inbreds and the lie detector.

These were all Kate Rushworth's favorite topics from the Shit TV section of Small Screen

1030 Bargain Hunt:

Drew trawls eBay to see if there's anything worth snapping up.

1100 Flog It!

Richard leaves a load of stuff in the doorway because he wants to sell it.

1130 The Daily Politics

Like Bona Dicta, but every day. Fun.

1230 Judge Judy

Today: should Sarah be allowed to date outside of YSTV?

1300 Still of Greg Dyke With The Caption 'He Likes YSTV'

Because we can.

1400 Ozzy Atton: A Celebration

Clips from Elections 2003,4 and 5; Bona Dicta; YSTV Week and Battle of the Bands. No particular reason, though, just to celebrate the man.

1529 The Best of Off The Cuff

1530 CYSTV

Favourite programmes for younger viewers, including

1530 Kat & Ben

New version of the flowerpot-based show for the 21st century, where Ben boots Bill out of his pot because he'd like his girlfriend to move in.

1545 Short Change

Everyone goes to James asking for some.

1610 P169/169

Confusing vision-control-based version of the Scottish schools show.

1635 The Story of Dave Baker

Dave rescues computers from computer services, known as the 'dumping ground', and provides frequent animated sections for the show for no particular reason.

1700 Blue Peter

Pete, Sarah and Lucy show you how to make a new look for your own music show.

1725 Bulletin

Very short news programme that's hardly worth bothering with.

1735 Neighbours

Day-to-day quarrels and romance between YSTV and Ents.

1800 The Simpsons

Because we've always shown it so we better carry on showing it.

1830 Look North

Regional news programme covering Alcuin and surrounding areas.

1900 Wildlife on Campus

Ducks, ducks and more bloody ducks.

1930 GoodrickeEnders

There's shock in the college when the vending machine is out of Diet Coke Lemon, and the JCRC return big telly on time. Meanwhile C block residents attempt to construct doors to complement the frames already in place.

2000 Bailiffs

A look at what might happen to URY if SBN's lawyers get their way.

2030 Meet the Ancestors

1/6: Michael Prior-Jones

2100 Flinders: A Warning From History

Landmark documentary series about one of the greatest threats to face YSTV. Followed by Desperate Directors.

2200 100 Greatest Music Show Title Sequences

2230 Bufton and Hughes Unplanned

A look at the early days of Small Screen.

2300 Question Time

Why is the clock sometimes black and white?
Why is the clock always wrong?
Why do we carry on meeting at YSTV fifteen minutes before the meeting when we all know where we're going?
Why is there a photo of Joe Pasquale pinned to the wall by the monitor rack?
Where did those holes in the floor come from?
Why not have circuit three before one and two because it is used more?
Dan Smarg: true or false?

0000 Bona Dicta: The Bits They Tried To Ban

By popular demand, that Al Power monologue in full.

0030 Great Phone Calls to YSTV

No. 37: "When do you start filming Heartbeat again?"

0035 Pages from Inform

0200 YSTV Learning Zone: Soldering with Richard

0300-0600 YSTV News 24

24 minutes of news repeated till dawn.